When I made my 30 Before 30 list, I promised myself that I would not define my success or failure by the ability to check off every single item, OMG. I made the list to bring more joy, more fun, more satisfaction into my life. I have a bad habit of making long lists of things to do, only to accomplish the work-related items and neglect the fun items. I promised myself that my 30 Before 30 list would only comprise things that I wanted to do, and that I’d give myself a break if I didn’t check off every single one.
Today, I am crossing an item off the list. Not because it won’t be completed, but because I have chosen to not rush it. We’ve picked a wedding date, and it will not be prior to my 30th birthday.
When we began to plan the wedding, I promised that I would not be bound by Item 29 of my list. I promised myself that I would go with the flow and pick a time that worked for us, rather than trying to rush through a list that I made largely on a whim. Alas, I’m such a little perfectionist that I found myself justifying why a wedding date prior to November 12, 2010 would make sense. I argued for it over and over, refusing to admit two things:
1. A wedding date this coming fall does not make good sense for us, for a number of reasons.
2. We kind of like being engaged. We’re only planning on being engaged ONCE in our ENTIRE LIVES. We will be married for the next sixty-some years, but we will only be engaged for a little while. I’m really just kind of luxuriating in it.
After doing some deep thinking and taking several deep breaths, HW and I both agreed that May, 2011 is a far better timeframe for us. Suddenly, the world seemed to open up. Everything made so much more sense, everything seemed easier. The location was available, the minister was free, and our families were into the idea.
And so, we have a wedding date: May 28, 2011!
I’m crossing Item 29 off the list, but I don’t consider it a failure, for sure. I have a wedding date! Woohoo!!!
Woo hoo! The world opening up is a very good sign.
Hooray! I’m glad you didn’t pressure yourself into an earlier date. Enjoy your engagement!
Yay!! Good for you for being flexible and doing what makes sense…I find it so hard to do sometimes, but so satisfying when you know it’s right for you.
There is NO FAILURE in that!
Totally excited for both of you. May is a lovely month to get hitched.
Yay! May is a beautiful month for a wedding – thrilled for you both.
Perfect date for a wedding! This way, your anniversary will always be around a 3-day weekend.
That’s why I got married on May 25.
Happy planning! This is such a fun time. So excited for you both!
Congratulations on picking a date! And not holding yourself to your list when you realized it wasn’t working out as well.
thats a good one to cross off!! hooray for setting a date! And…with more than a year to plan, you are GOLDEN.
Yay for setting a date!
Is your birthday Nov 12th? Mine too!
May sounds like an awesome month to get married (says the girl getting married this May, ha), especially if you’re doing it out here!
We had a similar problem, though, in choosing. We both really wanted a fall Sept/Oct wedding, as it’s so gorgeous here then, but we got engaged in May and a) it would be pretty near impossible to plan a wedding in CA during that time and b) I already had my next three months booked solid with travel! Winter is so rainy here (see: today, yesterday, the past MONTH) and my sister was sailing around the world from Jan-May, so in the end, we planned it as tightly around her trip as possible and made the date two weeks after she returns! And now, it’s been 8.5 months with just 3.5 months left of planning and I’m all “WHERE DID THE TIME GO???”
Whoohoo indeed. Congrats to you!